Happy Mothers Day

Today is my first day as a mom and, though the actual day was crumby, the mother part was perfect! You gave me a fabulous first mothers day. You slept so well and after eating at about 8 am, went right back to sleep until 10:30. Just the two of us went to church together and you played with me all during Sacrament and giggled so much and so loud in Sunday School that the entire class and the teacher stopped to admire you. When we got home you took a huge 3 hour nap and then we ate dinner and played until bed time. You are such a doll! I feel like we survived a bit of stress between 6-9 months and now it's all fun and games. You are so squishy and completely happy. You are the cutest baby I have ever seen and whenever I take you out, strangers admire you and children stop to look at you. It's not just your amazing and gorgeous face- your personality is completely captivating too. Even Uncle Bob can't take his eyes off of you and held you last night at the Diamond Talent dance recital. I find myself already grieving- seriously grieving- over you growing up and no longer being a baby! I can't handle it! I want to freeze both of us in these perfect baby moments forever. I no someday when I am old and grey that I will ache to hold sweet perfect cuddly baby you! You are absolutely perfect and I can't hardly stand to be away from you. I think you feel exactly the same way because whenever you see me for the first time after you've been with a babysitter, you cheer loudly and bounce up and down with you arms up waiting for me to come and hug you. We really have the best of times together and terrific adventures. I wish I could capture some of it and tuck it away in a bottle forever. I love being your mom Annie, it really is the best feeling and the best job and the best of everything in the whole big world.

Here are some of my favorite 8-9 month pictures of you:








Developments:

• You have learned to wave! You are even associating waving with the words hi and bye! It is perfectly exhilarating to watch you learn. I'm convinced that because of your waving, you are a genius. It's so cute to watch you think very hard in order to get just one hand to move back and forth. You have the best wave I've ever seen.
• For a while now you hold your arm up in front of you when we are walking. This is one reason why I call you Her Majesty.
• Grandma Cindy has taught you to sing into spools of thread. You love the sound so much that tonight you started to do it on your own into your little stacking blocks.
• Once, just once, this week you started covering your eyes with your hands to play peek-a-boo. You can easily hold a blanket up and down, but hands over you eyes is something entirely new.
• You love to share you bites and binks with me and get a kick out of putting things to my lips and then taking them back.
• You make silly faces like squeezing your eyes shut tight while you smile and look up or sticking your tongue out.
• Finally FINALLY you are eating. But you only really like food you can pick up and feed yourself. I still have difficulty getting you to eat baby food and you will only take a few bites of vegetables. You love fruit. Mangos and pears are your favorite right now and you LOVE drinking from a straw. Good thing I anticipated this and bought a 100-pack at IKEA last month.
• No crawling. You will not even try. It's just like how you used to be with being on your tummy. Someday. We don't give you much practice time though because someone is holding you 90% of the time. We just can't get enough of you and have trouble sharing you with each other, In fact, Q was quite upset that Grandpa Ron held you in his arms until you fell asleep at the clogging recital on Monday. It's true, everyone who knows you and sees you wants to hold you. We have quite a bit of trouble keeping strangers' hands from touching you.
• You were always cuddly but lately you have started to snuggle with me- just me! And I love it! You will put your head on my shoulder when you're tired and you always let me squeeze you in for a very long hug.
• You absolutely LOVE to be upside down. You will trow yourself backward sometimes to get us to hold you up side down. It's your favorite thing to do.
• You LOVE Buster. In fact, you don't seem to know anyone's name yet but you have been able to look at Buster every time we say his name or Doggy for a few months now. Grandpa Ron let you ride Buster this week and you went ballistic you were so thrilled. I also let you pet Buster a few times but you keep grabbing his fur to try and pull his face over because you want to touch his face not his back. You are relentless. Buster doesn't exactly like you. He'll stare at you but always keeps a distance. You love Buster in particular but you also like all dogs. It's funny how early you loved dogs- you don't even like cats or cows or other animals as much as love dogs. From the time you could turn your head you would follow Busters movements around the room and you recognize his dog sounds a mile away and always stop to turn and see him whenever you hear him coming.
• I'm pretty sure your second favorite person (after me) is currently Megan. You scream in utter bliss whenever you see her.
• We introduced you to balloons and you are now in love. I really think you could play with one balloon for entire days on end without interruption and be content. It's so funny to watch you with one though because you will try not to touch it even though we can see how badly you want to capture it because you don't want to push it away from you.
• Sugar. I have caved and officially given you several bites of sugar filled deserts like ice cream and sugar cookies. You are hooked. The expression on you face when I let you taste my sweet tooth fairy sugar cookie last night and today was one of total ecstasy and bliss. I don't blame you, but I'm a bad mommy for giving you a taste because when you cry for more I can't deny and second and third bite.
• Speaking of bites, you takes thee cutest bites I've ever seen! You really commit your whole body to it if you know you'll like what's coming (which is only sweet things like fruit and sugar). If you don't like it, you spit it out or take it out with your fingers and once you know you don't like what's on the spoon, you have developed very sophisticated methods of averting me even coming close to your lips.
• I get to put bows and clips in your hair now! and you do have wild hair mind I add. A little bit of curl. So cute. So cute!
• You sing when we go on walks and you absolutely love music. You usually sing along when you hear others singing. We are super convinced you will be very musical when you grow up. You are enamored with anything music.
• You love watching other babies and kids and will stop and focus completely whenever you see one. You are particularly fascinated with crying babies. You enjoy being a baby so much I think you wonder why on earth any other baby would cry.

You are such a content happy little think. You laugh spontaneously and smile constantly. I love you Annie! You make my entire world perfect. I ask you all the time if we can be together always and I beg you never to go away from me. Honestly, how did I get thee best baby ever? I love being your mom. I absolutely love it! I think I will just have to go on being your mom forever!!!!!!

Just to prove it, I'm going to buy you a house!

Annie Annie Annie-

I have been meaning to update this little journal of yours but haven't gotten to it for much too long. We have been preoccupied with crazy life. It started with you getting sick, and I do mean SUPER sick! It was the worst absolute most awful thing to hear you struggling to breathe and to hold little you in my arms and know you were miserable but I couldn't help you. I wished so many times it was me who was sick. I wished we could trade places and I could suffer through it for you. I thought of how this is only the beginning of me wishing that same wish and I will probably always be wishing to bare your burdens for you. I understand completely and suddenly how moms are able to give so much of themselves and still wish they could give more. I would do anything for you, anything in an instant. It is odd how fast my willingness to sacrifice for you came into my every fiber of being!

So you were sick- and then two days after recovery you got sick again! Oh no. It was not fun but not nearly as bad as the first time. We thought you had strawberry allergies for a minute and even took you into the doctor... AGAIN... turns out you were just sick... again. Speaking of the doctor- you had a check up last week (we are getting to know the doctor pretty well lately and paying quite a few co-pays might I add) and you had an awful rash. We couldn't figure out what it was and I assumed it was from feeding you. The doc confirmed it was a topical rash so I blamed Quinn's full FOUR squirts of soap when he bathes you. The rash abated by kept changing and has never fully left. Finally we figured it out tonight. In fact, your rash was so bad you started scratching your chest and you even started bleeding in some places (kill me now). It occurred to us that you ARE allergic to food- but not from eating it, you are allergic to touching it! Oh how bad I feel that I have been exposing you to this painful red puffy itchy rash! We are glad to have finally solved the mystery but now we have a new problem on our hands: how am I going to feed you if you can't touch food! We were FINALLY having a teeny bit of success by letting you feed yourself but now that is out. The only way I could get you to eat is to let you hold big pieces of food and suck on them or put them in your mouth yourself. You think spoons are torture devices. I'm not sure what to do now. I'm hoping it's just veggies and fruits you can't touch and that maybe I can rig up some sort of millet cracker and still feed you puffs. Ug. We have been doing millet (you hate the texture) and you love the taste of bananas, avocados, and sweet potatoes... but I know for sure you can't touch bananas and avocados so... I'm not sure how to get you to eat now. It took a month to keep you from spitting these food out and you still do half the time. Pits. You can't even touch them without your fingers turning red within a few minutes. Oh- now I feel so bad again.

Speaking of food... guess who had teeth! Yes, you! Beautiful you has beautiful teeth! Watching you grow is the most amazing miraculous thing I have ever witnessed. It is completely different when it's your own baby. It's like seeing someone grow for the first time. Your first tooth popped out on February 22nd and the second one appeared this morning! You are so big now. Just this week you have started acting so grown up and so big baby! You can sit up pretty well, grab things with you hands and fingers, and you have started to talk and sing and play games. You love to throw yourself backwards (scary for all of us involved in watching you) and you love peek-a-boo and to be lifted upside down. You also still love head bonks. Annie, you have even learned who Buster is and you look at him when we say his name to you. You sing whenever Mom plays the piano and you still smile all of the time. Your right foot is always moving moving moving and last night when grandpa stopped rocking you, you would move back and forth to get him to start again. Everything you do is the cutest most perfect and amazing thing anyone has ever done. I am positively enamored and in love with you!

New developments are coming fast now. Last night I decided I was done putting you to sleep and (painfully) it was time for you to learn to sleep on your own. I'm not sure why, but I decided since it was going to be painful anyway, to switch to a new arms free sleep sack AND put you in your crib AND stop feeding you before bed AND put you to bed earlier. Sheesh. I'm a tough mom! What was a thinking? We started yesturday and nap time was no good. 2 hours of you crying off and on (but mostly on) before I gave up and "rescued" you. In fact, I had to eat an entire IKEA candy bar to get myself through it! I kept thinking, if only she knew I haven't abandoned her and I'm really right here on the other side of the door crying with her!!!!! Oh the agony. But I was resolved, and when it was time for bed, I let you got 40 minutes before you crashed. Ready for the best news: tonight you only cried for 3 minutes and then you talked yourself to sleep with cute little baby sounds! I can't believe it. I better not say it out loud, but I think we've done it. Way to go Annie. I couldn't be more proud.

I'm proud of you every minute of the day. I spend many moments wondering why on earth there isn't a camera crew filming and documenting everything you do because OBVIOUSLY the entire world should want to see it! Sometimes it almost hurts to think I am the only one enjoying your fabulous-ness! I think to myself, why isn't everyone paying me big money just to watch how cute you are. I'm hooked on you. Totally, completely, positively HOOKED on you. And just to prove it, tomorrow I am going to buy you a house!

Here are some pics of your latest...

You love to play the piano with my mom. You've discovered the joy of hitting the keys but even more, you absolutely LOVE music and will stop whatever you are doing the second a song hits your ears.

I have been putting you in some of my 30-year-old dresses for church and this one is my favorite. You are the star of church and I love showing you off!

You've decided to be okay with your car seat for a week or two. You still HATE getting into it though and do better when the sun isn't shining so I can uncover you and let you see out. You still smile on cue.

You got your first piece of mail. It was a valentine from Lailee!


We took you to the Parade of Homes and you loved walking around and smiling at people and seeing yourself in all of the mirrors! Q carried you the whole time. Everyone admired you as we showed you off.


Q held you as he blew out the candles for his 31st B-Day. You have to have one leg out and kicking all the time. You are also mystified by his hats.


We have started visiting downstairs a lot. Sometimes we catch Grandpa Metcalf who enjoys saying hello and laughing at your silly stares and smiles.


Nor decided to brush your hair into several hairstyles this evening and this is his final creation. We thought you looked like a Hoo from Hooville.

You love attention and are so happy and content. You especially love this frog that Chris bought for the grandparents' house. You've started talking a bit and even have two beautiful teeth!

We have been trying food with not much success. We started and then stopped because you developed this horrible rash and since we've picked back up again it seems you have vetoed anything but puffs. Ug. You were the poster child until now. Food is NOT your forte.


Q sent me this photo of you on his phone when I was at work one Thursday. It was the first time you held your own bottle (unless we count that time I propped it up in your stroller at Costco). I was mad I was at work instead of with you... which happens ALL THE TIME! I can't wait to be a full time stay at home mom but I can't imagine when that will be. I wish it was now! The older you get, the more I hate leaving you for work. I thought it would be the opposite. You are the best little pal and each time I finish working I race home to see you. I don't even hope you are sleeping anymore so I can take a nap. I just have to get my arms around you and quench the aching and longing for you as fast as possible. My arms literally hurt to hold you. In fact, when you cry and someone else is holding you, I can not bare the pain of it and I have to get you into my arms as soon as possible. It's a physical longing I cannot explain and that I now believe will only increase with time. I will never not be able to hold you.

Happy Half Birthday

Dear Annie,
Today you are 6 months old! It is completely exciting in every way. You are so big and doing such big baby things. Your progress blow my mind- but what really gets me is how suddenly and completely we are attached to one another. I can't get enough of you. Every day I spend as much time as possible kissing your chubby cheeks... and you LOVE it! You let me kiss you as often and as many times as I want. You love to cuddle with me and I love to squeeze you. My arms ache for you when we are apart for long and I am convinced you are the most beautiful, smart, perfect angel baby in the world. No really- you are. Everyone tells me this as well. For your half birthday, Q watched you while I taught school then we took you to Walmart where I bought yet another package of binks. I can't figure out where they go especially since you can't even crawl yet! After a big nap, we gave you your first food (if we don't count the apples we've been letting you suck on). You love the taste of avacodos but did not like swallowing solids (or mush anyway). Still, you did very well and enjoyed the entire experience. You let us know how awesome this new eating thing is with squeals of delight. I think the mess was your favorite part. We are hoping some real food might help you sleep longer periods of time at night. 6 months of 3 hour sleep increments is taking it's toll on your mother dearest! I am ready to sleep longer! So Happy Birthday to my amazing daughter who has made every bit of my life fuller and deeper and better in every way. Whose little hands touching my face warm my heart beyond explanation. Whose laughs and smiles are worth millions and millions of dollars. Whose perfect personality is intriguing and interesting. You are my world. I love you forever and ever. I ask you often if you can stay a cute little baby forever. You love being a baby so much and are completely happy and content all the time. It is an odd thing to be excited for your growth and progress while at the same time be totally sad that you are changing so fast. I don't want to miss it later but I know I will yearn for sweet baby Annie the rest of my life. You are beyond description. -Mum


The latest developments:

More cute dresses from 30 years ago. This was a few days before you became utterly and scarily sick beyond measure!

We now read books to you right before bed time. We think the bath was getting you a little too wound up for sleep so we are hoping this helps calm you down. Actually, I think it was working quite well until you got sick. I was putting you to bed while you were awake even... but now. Oh boy- we are back to square 1 and I am cheating by feeding you to get you to sleep.

You have started to sit up by yourself. We have to keep a close eye on you because you topple over, but you can sit unassisted for a bit. Now that you can sit up, you like this way better than sitting down. Toys are more exciting too. If I put the right toy in front of you, I can get you to stay on your tummy for maybe 4 seconds now instead of you trying to roll over before I even finish setting you down.


You were SO sick. SO SO sick for 10 days. We took you to the doctor and to the hospital. It was the worst ever Annie. So scary. Please don't scare us again. Don't ever be sick again. Your dad was going crazy out of his mind scared for you! He even called grandpa to help him give you a blessing. We have outlawed you getting sick ever again. I must tell you though, even though you were a VERY sick little baby, you didn't cry at all. You smiled through the worst of it.. and the worst was worse than we could bare. Even grandma Cindy had to walk out of the room because she couldn't stand hearing your breathing and wheezing. Oh Annie. We missed you so much while you were sick. We had almost forgotten what you were like it was so bad and so long. Thank heavens you are back!

Lailee is interested in you but you are only interested in her moving feet! Isn't that funny?!?! I though for sure you would like looking at her. Nope- You just keep trying to grab her feet. Silly Annie.

Keeping Up

I am not keeping up as well as I'd like with your journal but between this and the other blogs I am logging, your amazing and fantastic life is documented in full and living color. It's late but I can't bare to think you may not know a few very important things before I go to bed. First is that I absolutely ache to hold you and hug you. My arms yearn for you even in the exhausted moments of putting you down after a middle-of-the-night snack (q hates when I call it that). I am amazed by you and caught myself thinking much today of how I will long for these days and perfect moments with you when I am old and you are no longer little and so squishy. I told Q tonight how weird it feels that in the same instant I am excited for when you are older but want to keep you frozen like this forever. I listen to Grandma Polly talk about her kids when they were babies and it makes me realize just how precious this time is. Here are a few things about you. I try to keep the intimate moments between us or day-to-day snap shots in this journal so you have a better picture of what you life is like when you are the most perfect adorable baby in the universe.

(Above) You are really getting into play time and can sit up so well now. Here you are in your activity center. Your feet are almost touching the bottom but for now I have to spin you from toy to toy.




(Above) I wanted to capture the precious moments we have with you when it's time to go to bed. Q is the best at getting you to accept lotion being put on your face. This is also the most perfect time (in your opinion) to suck on your toes! You love your right big toe the best so I caught it on film. You also make the cutest faces (straight lips and pudgy pouts). Lately you giggle when I kiss your chubby legs. It is so fun to play with you and you LOVE getting your diaper changed!

(Above) I'm not sure if anyone loves you more than your Grandpa Ron. He calls himself "grandad" and refers to you as "his baby". Right now you like to sit on his lap, touch his face, and listen to his crazy sounds. He talks about you all the time and is amazed by you perfect little face and fast development.

(Above) You are starting to try to sit up on your own and we think you are getting quite bored with being immobile. In this pic you are watching your favorite thing ever: Football. You absolutely LOVE football. You will sit on Q's lap and watch football forever! If we turn the channel, you don't like TV nearly enough- and you totally know the difference between football and any other sport. You have loved football from your first months of life. It is so funny!


(Above) You like to move your right leg MUCH more than your left. Your right leg is ALWAYS going a million miles an hour or you are playing with your right foot. Usually, you just forget about your left. You particulary love to slide and kick your right leg back and forth when it sit you on a table and hold onto to you.

(Above) You love people and to be in the middle of the action and commotion. In this pic I am carrying you around at our New Years party in PV. You also let me put your bunny hat on without a fight but I generally don't put hats or bands on your head because I can't stand to cover your totally rad mad scientist hair!


(Above) You have always seemed to know Grandma Polly, like you two are kindred spirits from the start. Here she is singing your favorite little birdie song! When you were just two months old, you would stop and focus on GPo when she sang this song and seemed to recognize it when I sang it to you at home. You also love Claire de Lun and This is a Little Irish Jig for Annie (I made it up and you LOVE it- it's the only one that will get you to stop crying when we are driving and you are imprisoned in your car seat).

(Above) Look at you! No more pram. Tonight I put you in the Uppa Baby and pulled you up to the table so you could watch us play cards. You love this ugly crakle-book so much! In fact, mom bought it because you liked the one I bought you so much. When all else fails, you will play with this with no abandon.


(Above) Q moved your bath of the counter and into the tub because of your intense splashing. I took these photos because your hair was too awesome to forget. I need to get you some bath toys. We have moved your bath time up a bit because (thanks to a suggestion from Mom, we discovered your bath gets you too hyper for bed right away). We let you soak as long as possible and lately Q has been the best bath giver.

ANNIE AVI:
I really need to start getting your videos uploaded so we will start with these two. The first is from tonight when GPo wheeled you around and then played for you while we had a card game. You love music. No, really- you LOVE music. GPo and Mom are convinced you are some sort of Mosart sans the autism. I am so excited I got GPo singing the Birdie song on tape!

(Below) In this one you were mesmorized by your first ever look at a candle. I'll have to remember this in case I need a distraction in the furture. You have done so well with the boppy early on.